... the "real world" seemed less real?

"So... what's next?" Seems to be the first question I'm receiving these days. Before asking about the last six months, or what I learned about life or about myself. Before asking about the people I met or the challenges I encountered, people want to know how I'm going to readjust to "the real world." A phrase that is always dripping in contempt and served with an eye roll or two. If the real world is so unpleasant, why have we all come to accept it as the norm? Shouldn't we do something about it instead of treating our lives like passive passengers in a train that's moving full force ahead towards materialism and a "bigger is better" mentality? What's next for me is rethinking what is really important, what makes me happy, and how I can find a middle ground between the freedom and joy I experienced traveling and pair it with a career or means to support myself financially. I don't want to jump right back on the track because having been off of it was the most exhilarating experience of my life. Life is short and unpredictable, and I'm ready to rethink my own. 

This isn't as easy as it sounds. I met so many travelers who lived a vagabond life - working in a cafe or hostel for a few months in order to continue traveling. At first I have to admit I judged these people a bit - "shouldn't they get a real job? How are they ever going to get one when they get back to wherever they're from? They must be running away from something... avoiding reality." But as I got to know more of these people, I realized that while some may be running away or avoiding the norm, most were sublimely happy. Some of the most blissful, relaxed and open people I've ever met. Not stressed, not attached to their cell phones and rushing around constantly, not obsessing over relationships or difficult coworkers or any of the other things I know I felt back in the "real world." So why would I judge that? Maybe we judge because they are doing something that feeds into our own insecurities. Society has made it seem scary and impossible to jump off the track by imposing fear tactics. Retirement savings, investments, insurance, security... these are all important things but are they the only things? Should they dictate how we choose to live our un-guaranteed 90-some years?

I know I may sound like a converted hippie (so what maybe I am?), and none of what I'm saying is necessarily new, but I finally gained an understanding that there are broader paths to choose and it's making me rethink my own. Nothing is wrong with working in the corporate world or placing emphasis on a successful career - I will probably get back into both. I enjoy work and excelling at it, but I want to remember what I've learned and ensure that my happiness is a priority. So cheers to hoping to find the balance - I'm open and optimistic (and a tad overwhelmed).

All for now...

This photo reminds me of what makes me happy - no makeup, damp from a 6 hour hike in the rain, but thriving in nature and new things. Loved Inle Lake in Burma - thanks to Shasta for the photo.

... it was time to come home?

I left a few loose ends there didn't I? I couldn't write much about the winding down of the trip or my own reflections on the entire six month experience because on January 20th I hopped on a flight back to the states and conspired with my aunt and friend to surprise my mom. Her reaction was priceless and made all the scheming well worth it. That being said, I want to talk a bit about the end of the trip and my adjustment in coming back home.

The last month in Australia was so different than the rest of the experience - much more western for one, but full of some amazing people who left quite the impression on me. Camping with Amanda and Niv was such a fun experience and I hope to do much more of it back in the states (once this snow clears up that is). Amanda's family was nice enough to let me stay with them in Sydney for my last week and we had a blast playing in the pool with her adorable niece, having family BBQs, crashing an intimate Brazilian's birthday party as the only non-Portuguese speakers, playing foosball in a mansion at 2am, attempting to surf, and bicycling around North Curl-Curl. It was sunny, beautiful, relaxing and fun. I could totally live in Australia.

Amanda and I said goodbye to Niv (another new lifelong friend) and I was able to reconnect with a friend Ben who I had traveled with in Burma. He had come back to Australia early and the stars aligned for us to meet up. So many great conversations that will have a lasting impact. One in particular sticks with me. Niv and I were sitting out by the campfire one night talking about politics, religion, the afterlife and reincarnation (obviously), and shared some of our own beliefs and personal experiences. I was having a hard time dealing with some stuff in the past (losses of people and relationships more specifically) and he said "Evelyn, don't go backwards - your life should always keep moving forward and getting better. Looking backwards won't do you any good." Rehashing old relationships lost and stressing over details of how things were left with family and friends that have passed away can be good to an extent, but there comes a point where its time to move forwards and focus on the new. 

I was reminded of this recently when I went back to Chicago to visit friends. It immediately felt like being home and I felt such a draw to go back to my old life - I could easily find a job and have my great friend circle and life back just like that. So why shouldn't I? It would be so easy. My conversation with Niv popped into my head and I realized that while I could hop back into my old life, it would be different because I am different. I want new things. I want a challenge. Who knows what the future will hold and if some day I'll return to my old stomping grounds, but if I do it should be with new goals and challenges.

Looking back can remind us of who we once were at various stages of our life. But looking forward can allow us to imagine an even better self - and shouldn't we always be striving for self improvement? I never want to feel stagnant. So while I am still weighing my options and figuring out my next path in life, I can guarantee it will be full of challenging trials that will make me that much stronger. 

All for now...

Video of surprising my mom - watch here!

Becky & Amanda - my awesome Australia hosts!

The only non-Brazilians at Eduardo's Birthday party, so fun!

Feeding a wild kangaroo near Hat Head National Park

Can you beat this view? Australia's eastern coast is unbelievable.

My host family in Sydney - BBQing of course!

Back in Chicago celebration!

Girls reunion weekend in Chicago - love them

My mom was so shocked, love a good surprise!